Narrys phone call recap

Hey beautiful, I want to explain why I suggested you speak up for yourself at your mom’s birthday instead of having your friend pull you out. When you go into a triggering situation (like seeing your mom when you know she might bring up your breakup), you have two choices:

•Abandon yourself

•Or stand with yourself

In the past, little you had no choice. You couldn’t leave, you couldn’t set boundaries, you couldn’t say, “This hurts me, please stop.” So your inner child learned to shut down, stay quiet, people,please, or just endure it. As an adult, every time you avoid using your voice and let someone cross your emotional boundaries again, it feels to your inner child like you’re leaving her behind all over. That’s why I encouraged you not to make your friend the escape route, but to let this be a moment where you protect little Narry. When you say something like:

"Mom, I want to honor your birthday and enjoy our

family time, but my breakup is still very sensitive for me.

I'd really appreciate it if we don't talk about it today.'

you are doing three powerful things:

1. You stop abandoning yourself. you're no longer forcing yourself to sit in a conversation that hurts you "just to keep the peace." You become the safe adult your innerchild always needed.

2. You create a clear boundary you're not attacking your mom. You're simply saying: "I love you, and I love me. This topic is not okay right now.

3. You show your subconscious a new pattern, instead of repeating the old pattern (staying quiet, shrinking, letting others control the narrative), you teach your nervous system:” Now, we speak. Now, we walk away if we're not respected."

And if your mom still doesn't respect that boundary, then you follow through with:

"I love you and I respect you but I also love and respect myself If this continues, I'm going to leave and let you enjoy your birthday, and we can talk another time.'

That is not drama. That is self-respect. The reason this is so important is because: every time you choose you, your inner child feels safer every time you honor your feelings, your anxiety lessens over time every time you use your voice, you weaken the old pattern of "I don't matter' You're not just handling one birthday party you're reprogramming years of conditioning that taught you to minimize yourself. So this isn't just about your mom or the breakup. This is about learning to stay with yourself in uncomfortable moments, instead of abandoning yourself to keep others comfortable. You deserve to feel safe, respected, and emotionally protected,even around family. And I am so proud of you for being willing to try something new. How does this make you feel?